If I Have a Daughter

If I have a daughter, I will teach her fashion and good manners, because it is an eternal truth that being pretty means more chips in the game of life.

If I have a daughter, I will show the world to her: seeing and tasting what life has to offer will infuse her with beauty and intrigue.

If I have a daughter, I will teach her how to be brave and strong. Neither damsel in distress nor helpless princess, she will instead face the trials of life resolutely, whether they are difficulties at work or a betrayal by her once-in-a-lifetime boyfriend. She will always be able to save herself.

If I have a daughter, I will want her to learn about people as much as she learns from her books. Facts are not enough to be successful in life; I want my daughter to understand the moods and modes and manners of people so that she can speak to their hearts.

If I have a daughter, I will give her advice. Life is short, opportunities transient; I want to help her focus on the forest and not just the trees in front of her.

If I have a daughter, I will give her space and freedom. She is not me, nor a copy of me, and I will never pretend that I completely understand her. I will give her a safe place to think and to dream, to plan and to fail, to try and succeed, so that she can grow into her full power.

If I have a daughter, I will encourage her to date. I think everyone has to experience the passion and tragedy of first love, that burning flame that turns to ash. Pain is part of growing up: pain will help her to understand how to love and be loved, how to comprehend what she wants out of life, how to treat others with kindness and compassion, and how to make the best choices for the future.

If I have a daughter, I will teach her to appreciate both herself and other people. Money and materialism and the glitter of high society are all whispers of ghosts, less than nothing; the only enduring things are principles and integrity and the sincerity of love.

If I have a daughter, I will love her with my heart, with my life, with my mind.